Parents Starting The 2011-2012 School Year Off Right, With Security In Mind… Gives You Peace Of Mind!

Posted on August 17, 2011 by Bill Wardell

What does that mean?

With Security In Mind

Working in the Online Security field for the past 6 years, I guarantee most parents don’t put Online Security or Internet Safety at the top of their to do lists…

With Security In Mind

When your children start riding a bike you are there every step of the way, holding the bike in place until they feel stable enough that the child says; “let go dad I can do it” only to have her tip over only three pedals more, sometimes you’re able to catch them sometimes your not… but your right there to lift them up and dust them off and give them a hug and say it is going to be OK… So, lets get you back on the bike and I will help you again, that folks is called LOVE!

When that same young women is old enough to drive… do you just throw her the keys and say have fun and I will see you tomorrow :) of course not… you start by understanding this example: Why would you give a kid under 16 a Cell Phone?

You would never give that same kid a set of car keys, until they had taken the Drivers ED class and passed it, also passed a written test and the drivers test given by the State and received their learners permit, and then a lesson or two from mom or dad on the do’s and don’ts of driving and then and only then, will you let that same kid out of the house, with the car keys! I forgot mention they’re also required to be insured, before they get behind the wheel!

So would you give that same child, the keys to a 750 HP FERRARI… or would you??

750 HP FERRARI

But, that is exactly what you do when you give a child access to the Internet and/or a cellphone & mobile devices, without your guidance and understanding of the dangers of the airwaves, and the super internet highway… their travels may take them into the dark regions or places you would never imagine, they would EVER go…

So please take the time to teach by EXAMPLE… when it comes to Internet Safety and proper etiquette of cellphone use and the high risks of improper behavior that can lead them into illegal activities such as Sexting, and passing nude pictures to their friends, they can also be using the internet (PC) for the same purposes…

So, please help them by doing whatever takes, including first awareness and then commutation, guidelines, limits and rules, maybe even online searches and researching for solutions on the internet!

Talk to them about all the possible dangers so you can protect them from the hidden potholes, and the winding curves of Grand Theft Auto on a stormy night, or even the slippery slopes on a social media mountain pass!

My main concerns for the coming year for all school children & teens are CyberBullying, Sexting and Pornography I think these problems are much bigger than most parents know and/or school administrators are willing to admit to…

Take 25 minutes a day to talk to each of your kids. Start building a solid relationship day by day, that later in life may save them from having life changing or horrible consequences!

With Security In Mind… Gives You Peace Of Mind!

Bill Wardell

Radio Security Journalist


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Bill Wardell

Posted on August 16, 2011 by admin

Bill is the Co-Owner of db Security, Inc. and Co-Developer of The Cyberhood Watch & The CHWR live radio show… He is also the Senior Editor, Creator, Developer of Online Security Authority, the Author of “Don’t Take Candy from Strangers” and an Authority Site Center Certified Coach. Speaker and Radio Show Host, Publisher, Researcher and National Radio Guest!

Bill is a father of 3 children and his wife’s name is Anissa. Bill’s love for his family has been the driving force behind his success over the last few years, and he has been actively been pursuing his passion of becoming an online entrepreneur.

His main focus has been working and dealing with the security issues of the day, such as ID theft, Online Predators, MySpace & Teens, and Keeping Our Children Safe with ever-growing online security issues when it comes to Internet safety and protecting families.

A well seasoned web veteran & social media developer, who created the CHW & CHWR information portals, including all the (CHW & OSA) web properties and networks! Bill is also an experienced webmaster who has mastered the technique of dominating huge keyword niches in the Top 10 in Google, Yahoo, and MSN with a tier 1 phrase that has 1.6 billion to 3.33 billion competitors! You can connect with: Bill Wardell and learn more about his: CyberHood Watch Blog.

Bill is a father of 3 children.

Bill is a father of 3 children.


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What is Confidence? (and how to be more confident!)

Posted on August 8, 2011 by Stephanie Kakris

What IS Confidence?

One of my most important roles in my business, “High Performance Kids” is helping parents to raise confident kids.
Kids who look upon a task and are prepared to say, “I can” – or “I will give it a go”.
Kids who persist at something that is important to them, even if they don’t master it right away.

I’m sure you’ll agree that in order to foster confidence in ourselves and our kids, it first helps to know what it is!

It won’t surprise you to hear me say that confidence is a multi-faceted trait. The best way to start defining confidence is to do a simple exercise.

Take a moment to bring to mind the most confident person you know or have seen (someone on TV, a speaker, a family friend, for example).
 What is it about this person that makes them seem confident?

This is something I ask parents during my presentation,
“5 Top Tips for Confident Kids”.

Here are some suggestions the parents have come up with:

▪                Their posture: the way they hold themselves.

▪                They speak as if they know what they’re talking about

▪                Self-assured

▪                Don’t care what others think of them

▪                Don’t seem to have fear of failure

▪                Open minded and listen to other’s opinions – not threatened by a different point of view.

▪                Believe in themselves and what they are doing

All of these are correct descriptions of a confident person – although I must point out that how people seem on the outside is not necessarily a correct indication of how they feel on the inside – but that is an issue for me to write about on another day.

Basically, I like to sum up confidence as:

“The belief in yourself and in your powers or abilities”

The key word here is “belief”.
  Belief requires faith, because until we’ve mastered something, how do we know if we can do it or not?
The truth is, we don’t really know.

Think about learning to ride a bike as a child.
 Were you a confident rider when you started learning? Probably not!
 You persevered because you believed you could master riding a bike. And this belief was built up gradually as you first mastered a tricycle. Then you moved on to a small bike, with training wheels. You started slow. Then got a little faster. You rode in the driveway or on the footpath. Then when you felt ready, the training wheels were removed. Then someone held the seat steady for you until you got going, and voila! You could ride a bike. 
You may or may not have had someone there to support or encourage you. Research shows that people tend to persevere when they have support and encouragement. This is what you can do for your kids.

Support your children but ALLOW THEM to do it for themselves. Doing it for them can actually undermine their confidence. Learning to persevere despite setbacks is a critical life skill, so don’t worry if they make mistakes along the way.
 It helps them to know you believe they can do it themselves, even if it takes a while!

The key to this whole example is that your kids (and you!) won’t be confident at something BEFORE you have a go!
 In other words, if we wait until we are confident at something BEFORE we try it – it will not happen!

So how do we make progress? I encourage my clients to start somewhere. If we don’t believe in ourselves (because of a lack of a previous track record), we need to BELIEVE IN THE POSSIBILITY. To take small steps each day to get us to where we want to go.

A little competence leads to a little confidence…a little more competence leads to a little more confidence… and so on until we’re a fully fledged bike rider!

In future articles I will discuss ways to build confidence, and of course more on raising confident kids. Being a parent who models “belief in the possibility” is a really great start to raising confident kids – if YOU need support here, you know where to find me!

-       Stephanie

 


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From Don’t to Do

Posted on July 29, 2011 by Natalia Erehnah

What I Focus on Expands

Close your eyes and think of an animal. Any animal. Real or imaginary. Except for a pink elephant. Don’t think, “Largest land animal on Earth.” Don’t think about that curly tail linked to another elephant. Don’t think about the long trunk spraying water. Do not think about its big, floppy ears. Keep your focus on any animal. But do not think about a pink elephant.

Perhaps someone has played this little game with you. I first heard it as a young child and was completely amazed that, try as I might, an enormous pink elephant suddenly occupied my whole mind. I had never thought of a pink elephant before, but as soon as I was told not to think about it, I could think of nothing else.

Don’t For Children

When children hear our words,don’t vanishes. We say, “Don’t play with your food.” They hear, “Play with your food.” Even if they realize that the instruction is not to do so, suddenly, this idea becomes irresistible.

It is more helpful to say what we mean clearly. For example, “Please put your fork down after you take a bite.” Or, “Please put your hands in your lap while you are chewing.”

Changing to the Positive

Consider these options and choose those that feel good to you.

Don’t run!…………………………….. Walk please!

You’re going to fall!………………… I see that you have really good balance!

Don’t hit your sister!………………. Come here and hold my hands to help you feel better.

Don’t for Parents

Just as it is easier to say “don’t” to our children than it is to find a supportive angle, it is easier to recognize what we don’t want than to determine what we desire. It is helpful to notice where our focus is. “I can’t wait for this day to be over.” “This really stinks.” “More dishes. More laundry. Can’t anyone in this family pee in the toilet?”

We notice how miserable we are being fat and out-of-shape, how long it has been since we’ve had a vacation, how little money and free-time we have. We become so enmeshed noticing lack, that when asked what we do want, we are unable to answer. We forget that we can desire something.

The Gift of Contrast

Noticing what we don’t want is a step. After noticing the signs that show us what we don’t want, we can consider: Do I want the opposite of this thing that I have? Do I want something else?

“Desire is the movement of life that carries us where we yearn to be.”

Jennifer Louden in the Life Organizer: A Woman’s Guide to a Mindful Year.

Notice what you desire. Notice what you want. Surround yourself with words and images that show the things or situations or experiences that make your heart sing. Let yourself consider the possibility that you can have what you desire and come talk about it at this discussion tab.

Getting to Yes! for Children and Parents

In the lovely book, Joyful Child, Peggy Jenkins includes a number of songs for increasing joy, gratitude and awareness. One of my favorites follows. It helps children (and parents) remember that they are in control of their lives.

What I Focus on Expands

To the tune of “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star”

What I focus on expands

My life is in my own hands

My thoughts and feelings they create

So I choose a joyful state

What I focus on expands

My life is in my own hands.

Power Shot for Expanding Focus

I like to sing the above song while doing the Cross Crawl. This movement (described below) facilitates the crossover of energy between the brain’s right and left hemispheres. I will help you and your child to:

1. Feel more balanced and energized

2. Think Clearly

3. Improve coordination

Here’s how to do the Cross Crawl:

· March in place.

· Touch the right hand to the left.

· Then, touch the left hand to the right knee.

· Continue, changing sides with each step.

· You can also touch the (opposite) knee to elbow, touch the (opposite) foot behind the back.

· Continue for three minutes.


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Three Steps for Helping Kids Transition Back to School

Posted on July 28, 2011 by Renaye Thornborrow

Three Steps for Helping Your Kids Transition Back-to-School

Empowering your kids to embrace change

Returning to school after summer break or starting school for the first time can be very stressful for children. Here are three steps that you can take to help smooth the transition if your children are uneasy about the upcoming school year.   

Step 1: Discuss and Manage Concerns  

Give your kids the opportunity to voice their fears about going back to school.  Once they’ve shared their concerns, work with them to brainstorm solutions. For example, if your child is worried about how he will perform in math class, create a plan to review concepts before school starts or hire a tutor if extra help is needed. If your child is nervous about making friends at a new school, invite some kids over for a play-date who already attend the new school. Knowing that their concerns can be alleviated will empower your kids to face change with more confidence. 

Step 2: Discuss and Visualize the Positive Aspects of the Change

Have your kids visualize positive aspects of going back to school such as seeing old friends, learning new subjects, and taking special field trips. Just like kids can use visualization to practice hitting a baseball, they can also use visualization to practice creating happiness and success in the classroom. 

Step 3: Celebrate and Honor the Change  

Schedule a fun event to mark the change. Honoring the change with a celebration will mentally prepare your kids for the transition.  Hosting a “back to school party” with friends, shopping for a special backpack, or going out for a meaningful family dinner can prepare your kids to embrace the new school year.

For more tips on empowering kids, visit http://adventuresinwisdom.com/sign-up-weekly-wisdom/# and sign up to receive weekly wisdom.


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Lazy Parenting: Doing Things for Our Children

Posted on July 23, 2011 by Natalia Erehnah

Thaddeus was working on his homework as I fried eggs for breakfast.  Not understanding a math problem, he became frustrated.  As he gritted his teeth and whined, I turned around and quickly solved the equation for him.  “There you go!” I said turning back to the stove.  Instead of politely thanking me, he cried, “No, no!  Don’t do it for me.  Teach me!”

Later that day, I saw this exchange on Facebook:

Talisman Camps and Programs When is it appropriate and helpful to be a “helicopter parent” for your special needs child? When does it become unhelpful?

Natalia When our children are in distress, it is time to step in and support them. We don’t need to facilitate every event and interaction because they are not doing it the way we think is best.

Talisman Camps and Programs Natalia, we like how you say “Support” but do not equate that with “do for”

Ouch!  There was my post from just a few days before along with a compliment on not “doing for” our children when that is exactly what I had done that very morning.

How humbling.

I completely and totally believe that, as parents, we should support and facilitate our children’s endeavors, be they social interactions or math problems.  Yet, in my haste, I had taken the lazy way out. I did the problem for him instead of making a suggestion that may have given him the information he needed to do the problem himself.

I could have facilitated a moment of learning and confidence.  Instead, my actions said, “You’re too slow.  Here.  I’ll do it for you.  You probably couldn’t do it anyway.”

Reading the Talisman posts that evening, I realized:

When I am lazy or hurried, I “do for” rather than support.

In general, I have no objection to laziness.  I am a big fan of down time, reading, lounging around, and just being.

In this situation though, my laziness and doing what was easiest in the moment, did not serve my child.  Ultimately, it will not serve me.

We want our children to slow down and pay attention.  I am committing to slowing down and paying attention myself.  I will pay attention to my children and how I can best serve them.

When my children are struggling, I will take a deep breath and ask:  “How can I help?”  I will listen to what they say and provide the support they need.  Instead of parenting by reflex, I will pay attention to the habits that are driving my actions and change them when needed.

It is infinitely more important to me that my children become confident and self-sufficient – including asking for what they need – than that they get perfect grades on homework assignments or act “right” according to some unspoken rules.

Allowing Success, Building Confidence

When children do things on their own, they learn:

  • I can do hard things.

  • I’m good at figuring stuff out.

  • Mama trusts me.  She believes I can do it.

When parents constantly jump in and do things for them, they learn:

  • I can’t do anything right.

  • Mom and Dad do everything better for me.

  • Mom never let’s me do anything.  She must think I’m stupid.

What are you teaching your children?  Will you join me in slowing down and paying attention?

We can learn from what we say and write and think.  We have all the wisdom we need inside ourselves.

I will be taking my own advice.  When my children are deeply frustrated, I will support them.  I will encourage, give a hint, teach.  I will still do things for them of course.  It is one of the ways I show my love.  But when I do for them, it will be from a place of love – not because it is more convenient for me.

Next time they are tying their shoes or clearing the table too slowly, I will let them be.

Getting to This Place

By gather with other mothers and support them as they support us, we move along in our parenting journey.  Won’t you consider joining one of my support groups for mothers?

Click here for more information.


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Why I Refuse to Worry About My Autistic Child’s Future

Posted on July 12, 2011 by Natalia Erehnah

wor·ry [wur-ee, wuhr-ee]

–verb

to torment oneself with or suffer from disturbing thoughts; fret.

Worry is a useless emotion.

Why should I torment myself and suffer about what may or may not be?  Why should I assume the worst possible outcome, when I can find comfort in a joyful scenario?

Bleak Future

I have taken a whiff of the statistics about independent living and employment prospects for autistic adults, but I do not intend to read further.  Statistics are meaningless to me.  Only 1% of children have an autism diagnosis.  We won that lottery and we can win again.  In fact, we win every day.  I love my life and am grateful for exactly the children I have.

Anything is Possible

For the past 11 or so years, my children have been actively showing me that things are not what they appear.  I wasn’t very quick in paying attention, but eventually, I could ignore them no longer.  I began to actively change my beliefs. Even as I establish new ways of seeing and being, I am open to ongoing change.

Where There is Movement, There is Life

If you have ever seen a still pond or a little segment of a stream where the water does not move, you have noticed how life there begins to decay.  Certainly, even the decay is movement and change — and necessary at times.  But, if I can choose (and I always choose my own adventure), I choose joyful, active movement.

I choose to be a rushing stream or a shimmering lake, not water covered with green and brown scum.

Autism as Evolution

 

 

 

The world is changing very quickly.  Maybe, by the time my children are grown, they will not need language to communicate.  Maybe, my own reliance on spoken and written words will hold me back in the next phase of evolution.  Or maybe not.  I don’t know.  As such, I am open to a brilliant future for all of my children and for myself.  Even if I cannot imagine what it will be and how it will come about.

What If I’m Completely Wrong?

What if a good command of language is still necessary?  What if flicking and stimming are not accepted?  What if Thaddeus grows up and cannot make life in the world work for him on his own?

Then, I will figure out what we need to do.  I will cross that bridge if I come to it.

For now, I support him and guide him to prepare for life as we know it, knowing that great changes are afoot.  Worrying and torment do not help him or me.

I will continue to build castles in the sky.

And to put foundations under them.


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Don’t Forget the WHY!

Posted on July 11, 2011 by Julie Jenkins Sathe
OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

This gallery contains 2 photos.

TweetShareEnlightened Discipline is teaching the WHY in all behavioral situations. Why? There are only 3 possible answers: Safe, Kind or Clean. Why. It’s the underlying truth to how Enlightened Discipline is different. Don’t forget THE WHY. My book, my philosophy … Continue reading →

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Let “The List” be the “Bad Guy”

Posted on July 9, 2011 by Renaye Thornborrow

It’s summer and one of the complaints I hear from many parents is “I’m tired of nagging my kids every morning to do what they are supposed to do.”

One of the tools that has helped our family is “The List”. Each morning my kids make a list of several things they must finish before they can play. Topping the list are the usual – get dressed, comb their hair, and brush their teeth. Then there might be two or three other items such as put away their laundry, complete their worksheets, or spend 30 minutes reading.

With the list, they know what must be done – it can take them 30 minutes or it can take them 3 hours…it’s up to them. The faster they complete their list the more free time they have.

When they ask if they can play my response is – “Is your list done?” They always know the answer and I’m not the bad guy.

Give it a try and let me know what you think…

Good luck!


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Natural Remedies for Treating Chicken Pox

Posted on July 3, 2011 by Wendy-Louise Jones

As a holistic therapist and herbalist I always treat my family’s ailments naturally,
and the chicken pox virus is no exception. A couple of weeks ago my eldest son
started with a slight fever, it wasn’t long before a few spots began to appear
on his back and neck.
He had recently been in contact with a friend who had chicken pox so I wasn’t
surprised to see the spots appear. Nor was I concerned about treating my son
with natural remedies.

I was actually quite relieved that he had been exposed naturally, and at a young age. Fortunately for children the worst thing is probably the itching!

Also known as varicella, (VZV – Varicella Zoster Virus) chicken pox is a very common
ailment in children, but despite being highly contagious it’s actually easy to
treat. It is an airborne disease spread easily through coughing and sneezing,
or through direct contact. A person with chicken pox is infectious 3-5 days
before the rash appears and continues to be contagious for a further 4-5 days
or until the spots have all dried up and crusted over. Here’s a list of natural
treatments:

  • Plenty of fresh filtered water (not tap water!)
  • Good nutrition (fruit & vegetable juices, soups and pro biotics)
  • Apple Cider Vinegar (Raw, unfiltered ACV is anti-viral & anti-bacterial) You can add the vinegar to bath water to fight the infection and reduce itching.
  • Oatmeal baths are also a very common treatment to help the itch. (Place a handful of oatmeal in a muslin sack or cloth, tied at the top to form a bag and simply place in the bath water and squeeze. The bag can also be used to wipe over the spots/blisters.)
  • Rhus Tox is a great homeopathic remedy for treating the itch. ( there are many other homeopathic remedies for chicken pox if accompanied by other symptoms such as a bad cough)
  • Chamomile baths (just make a strong herbal tea with chamomile and add to bath water)

    • My sons fever only lasted a few hours on the first day and subsided after giving rhus
    tox, the following day he had many more spots, mainly on his back, chest, scalp
    and face. But thankfully the rhus tox remedy also reduces the itch and he was
    not bothered by the blisters at all. I bathed him daily with chamomile and vinegar in his bath and continued to give rhus tox and within 3 days his spots/blisters had dried up with no itching, no fever, no cough or other symptoms associated with the illness.

It’s important to remember that the body will heal itself if provided with the right
conditions, the natural remedies aid the body in this process with no side effects and only beneficial effects which are in tune with nature and the human body.


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